I recently changed the default alarm tone on my phone. The old one felt unpleasant — the kind of sound that made me anxious before the day had even begun.
It reminded me that most of life comes pre-selected.
The default alarm sound. The default career path. The default way of spending weekends. The default expectations handed to us by society, or the quiet pressure of what everyone else seems to be doing.
We rarely notice these defaults because they feel like comfort. Familiarity is efficient. It saves effort. It keeps life moving.
But it also keeps life unexamined.
I’ve started to believe that life becomes better when you learn when to keep the defaults — and when to change them.
Always choosing comfort can limit growth. Many people stay with the settings they were given, not because they’re best, but because they’re familiar. They don’t look at other options. They don’t question the script. Life runs on autopilot.
On the other extreme are people who can’t stop optimising. They change everything constantly, searching for the perfect routine, the perfect system, the perfect choice. Instead of freedom, they find exhaustion. The pursuit of improvement becomes its own trap.
Technology makes these extremes easy to see. Some people never touch their settings. Others tinker endlessly — new themes, new apps, new preferences — always chasing minor upgrades that never feel finished.
The same pattern exists far beyond screens. Careers, habits, relationships, even the way we think about ourselves can become defaults we never chose — or projects we never stop rebuilding.
Safe defaults and endless optimisation are two different traps. One keeps you stuck. The other keeps you restless.
The balance is to pause occasionally. To notice what you’ve accepted without thought. To change what no longer fits. To try something new — and if it doesn’t work, return to the default, but with intention this time.
My goal is simple: not to reject comfort, and not to chase perfection, but to live deliberately somewhere in between.